上星期六是Vivian學校所屬奧勒岡州第15學區高中組一年一度的音樂獨奏比賽。從早上八點開始到下午四點，各種不同的樂器，管樂、弦樂、打擊樂、鋼琴，等等，有上百名學生代表學校報名角逐州比賽的代表權，Vivian參加了大提琴和鋼琴兩項比賽。感謝神，她很幸運地贏了兩個第一，她的一個好朋友也是學校同學得了小提琴第一，所以她們將要代表學區參加四月的州比賽。
比賽中有一個小插曲。。。她那天穿的是一件條紋襯衫、黑長褲、和黑涼鞋。出門前我就對她的服裝不大滿意，但也沒有要求她去換衣服。在她進去比大提琴之前，我發現她很瀟灑時髦地只扣到第三顆釦子，我覺得十分不妥，所以要求她把第二顆釦子也扣上，為了這個她還跟我有一點小摩擦，她覺得這樣已經很好了，這種形式的打扮本來就該這樣。但我堅持她不可以用她的眼光來衡量，要以我們成人、評審專業的眼光來看什麼才是合適的衣著。後來她看我要發火了，加上媽媽在一旁也勸她，所以她應了我的要求，覺得很「土」又不甘不願地扣上了。
大提琴拉完之後，評審女士先是誇她怎麼怎麼好，技巧也好，音樂性也好，然後很強烈的一聲「但是！」，話鋒一轉，開始批評她的衣著不適當，花了將近十分鐘的時間，説她不應該穿露腳趾的涼鞋，不該穿開釦子的襯衫，應該穿長裙，並勸誡她「如果」她被選擇去參加全州的比賽，她要想到評審們不是專業的音樂家就是大學教授，她一定要穿著合宜， 等等。我心想還好她多扣了一個釦子，否則這位評審一定會多加一條「袒胸露背」的罪狀。。。
有些人可能會認為這位評審的要求太多了，但是我很高興她願意很誠實並公開地給Vivian上了一課。這些話從我的嘴裏說出來，和從她的嘴裏説出來效果大不相同。這樣Vivian 就能明白，不是只有她的媽媽是保守的，有人要求得比我更嚴格，所以她以後會多想想，也許會願意更接納我的意見。唉！青少年！
Last Saturday was the day of the yearly Oregon OMEA District 15 high school solo competition. The competition went from 8:00AM to 4:00PM, includes winds, strings, percussion, and piano. More than one hundred kids represented their school to participate in this event to compete for the right to represent their school in the statewide solo competition. Vivian enrolled in both piano and cello and luckily she won the first in both competitions. One of her classmates and good friends won the first in violin category, so they will compete in the state solo in April.
There was one episode in the competition... Vivian wore a blue striping shirt, black pants, and black open-toe shoes to the competition. I was not satisfied with her outfit before we left from home, but I didn't ask her to change. Before she walked in to the string competition room, I noticed that she only buttoned to the third button, so I asked to button the one higher. She was not happy with my request because in her opinion, that was the "right style", it was supposed to be that way. But I insisted that she should not think from her perspective, instead she should consider what the adults and adjudicator will think. She saw that I was very insistent and about to get mad, plus my mom joined my team to persuade her, so she followed my request.
After she played the cello, the adjudicator started with how well she played, good technical skill, good interpretation, very music, all that kind of stuff... followed by a strong "BUT..." Then she started to criticize her outfit. She disagreed with open-toe shoes, pants, and buttoned shit. She also advised her to think from the professionals’ angle, not from a high-schooler. I thought to myself, fortunately I insisted in her button one more button, otherwise she would be added one more problem of "expose too much"...
Some people might think the adjudicator asked too much, but I am happy that she gave Vivian her honest and open comments, and taught her a good lesson. The effect of the same words is very different when it came from an adjudicator’s mouth. This way, Vivian will be able to understand and accept the fact her mother is not the only one being "conservative", there are some people are even stricter than me. And she might be more willing to accept my opinion accept my opinions. Sigh....teenagers!!
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